Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Yet another random post.

I guess i am having sleepless nights recently. I do feel very sleepy in the day that i thought I could sleep early in the night. But apparently, I had failed to do so. Had many long days but i still sleep in the wee hours of the night. Perhaps, night is the perfect time to do things the way you like without disturbance and the perfect time to think about things that appear in your mind randomly.

It is now 4am in the morning. I guess it is the teh tarik i had for supper or it is just me who refuse to sleep. Feeling sleepy after a few rounds of bridge. Hope i can concuss soon. Supper was at causarina curry. It was my first time there. The pratas were really good. Me, wen and pei ordered 4 pratas in total and shared it. There were 1 plain, 1 onion, 1 chocolate and one mushroom with cheese and egg. With the exception of the plain prata, the rest are really huge in size. If you like crispy prata, you should try it. =)

Planning to cancel all my tuition really soon. Really quite tired of it now. Went for an interview eatlier, the turnout was good that i waited around 2hr for a short interview. Shall not say much about it. Went around looking for a back pack and a short walk around orchard road.

I actually spent half my afternoon in orchard road yesterday for some shooting for a student documentary. It was an interesting and tiring process. Did learn alittle bit more about film making and all i can say about it is - tedious.

Friday was spent actually on the internship interview and due to schedule constraint, I was not be able to be part of the program but nevertheless, i am not that disappointed. Thereafter, i went to bugis to meet wen and mic after their ktv session. Walked a little around bugis before meeting them and we went to kino so that mic can see some books. Seriously speaking, i get a headache after looking at so many books. Haha. Maybe it is a book phobia. Hah. Thereafter, we had dinner at Food for thought and we proceed on to pool junction to chill. For pictures and more info, please refer to michelle blog. =)

I guess my mindset still the same, it never change and it cant seem to change. With regards to my previous post being a destroyer, in general terms, i tend to distance myself as though there is a barrier with regards to all my relationships with anyone as understanding gets deeper and in the process i destroy those relationships. Somehow, i am no longer close to those who i am close to in the past partly because of that. This made up some of my regrets. Even now when i thought of approaching them, there is a sense of fear in me which stops me from doing so and thus furthering away from one another. There is a friend whom i am close to since jc, someone whom i can talk to regards to homework, problems, craps and occassionally go out just for a meal or to chill. But now , we practically do not talk at all and i feel that our friendship is being wasted due to lack of communication and i guess another reason for that is, i do not know how to communicate with others. There are others out there who show their concern to me through sms though we seldome talk but i tend not to forward those sms replies. I feel apologetic towards them. It is easy to create friendship but it isnt easy to maintain it and ensure that the bond gets deeper and deeper. Even when it gets deeper, i may end up destroying it.

As the years passed, i guess i have become a little more open and straight forward as compared to the past. This good and bad point about me have sometimes causes unhappiness as i speak and yet at the same time, others would had understand me better then before.

With regards to this, to my dear friends, do leave me comments about what i had said regarding myself. I guess it is time to find out what type of person am I in your eyes and how you feel about me. So please drop me a message when you read this. =)


signing off... audrey at 2:59 AM